I wanted to clean the house today, but life got in the way. 

You insisted on finger painting and making pictures for everyone in the family.

How could I be mad about that?

I wanted to go to the gym, but you had a fever.

So instead, we laid on the couch for two days straight as I tried to make you comfortable.

I always love the extra snuggles, anyways.

I wanted to eat salad for dinner but you insisted on pizza.

Followed by homemade cupcakes. And because I know how proud you are after you put the sprinkles on, I took a bite. Did I feel guilty? Yes. But not when I saw your smile.

I tried to play what you wanted to play, but it’s hard for me. 

I’m so tired because no one in this house ever sleeps. And unfortunately, grown-ups don’t have as big of an imagination as kids. But I followed all 87 pages of the instruction manual and built your Lego house. And then I played catch with you out front.

I know all you really want is my attention and sometimes, it’s hard for me to give it to you.

I wanted to be patient today, but you wouldn’t stop fighting. 

Someone was pushing. Someone was stealing. Someone was saying “stupid”.

I know it’s hard to get along sometimes but one day you’ll realize how lucky you are to have each other.

I wanted to put you in your own bed but I couldn’t. 

Because if we’re being honest, I need you next to me just as much as you need me.

I wanted to put the phone down and the computer away but I had a deadline. 

And that even though I work from home, it’s a constant struggle to balance work-life and home-life.

I wanted to be the best mom I could be, but life got in the way.

But I learned that I can still be a great mom and make mistakes too.

That each new day is a fresh start in a child’s eyes.

That I’m going to fail but I’m also going to succeed.

That it’s okay for me to lose my patience or have a cheat meal.

Because life gets in the way. But that’s what life is. All of these little moments that we think are insignificant and when we look back on it, they’ll be the moments we’ll cherish the most.

So don’t let everything else get in the way of living your life. Let living your life get in the way of everything else.

The post But life got in the way… appeared first on The Samantha Show- A Cleveland Life + Style Blog.

Is this week dragging or what? I swear, I cannot believe it’s only Thursday. Almost to the finish people… almost to the finish…

What’s been going on here? A lot. But I’ll save the serious life happenings for another day and keep it light today. So let’s do an installment of currently, shall we?

Currently wearing: Shorts and a tank because it was HOT here today. I am loving the warmer weather and being able to get my kids outside and burn their energy. Lifesaver, fo real. I also listed a ton of clothes for sale in my Facebook group so if you haven’t joined, go do that!

Currently eating: Cadbury Mini Eggs. I love them but for the love of God I have NO self-control. But can we talk about these dark chocolate protein pancakes I’ve been obsessing over? For real, they’re life changing. I eat them with some PB2 and strawberries and it tastes like chocolate cake.

Currently drinking: Water. But I had my first Pink Drink of the season this week! Whoop whoop!

Currently watching: At this very moment, Property Brothers. But we just finished binge watching 13 Reasons Why and I have a whole post coming on that next week…

Currently reading: Nothing and I have so many books I want to read. I can’t seem to find time to sleep so finding time to read is probably never going to happen.

Currently planning: Trips, trips, and more trips! We have FIVE weddings this summer (only going to 4 of them as of now) so I’m working on all of the logistics for those. Plus a quick weekend trip to Georgia, Cleveland for the 4th of July and possibly The Outerbanks.

Currently loving: All of the fun things we’ve been doing as a family lately. That’s one of the perks of moving so often… new places to explore!

Currently singing: I just bought the Chainsmokers new album and if you follow me on Snapchat, you know my obsession with the Chainsmokers.

Currently wanting: A maid to come and clean my house. There just isn’t enough time in the day…

Currently dreading: Finding some cute bathing suits for the summer. Even though I’ve been working out and should feel totally ready for swimsuit season, I so don’t. Does anyone really feel good in a swimsuit? If yes, tell me your secrets.

Currently learning: How to change up and do different workouts. I used to be a strictly cardio kind of girl and sure, I felt great. And I was losing weight because it was just calories out vs. calories in. But I’m really enjoying learning different workouts, trying different machines and seeing (small) progress. It’s going to take while before I really feel like I know what I’m doing and get the hang of it but I’ve been making the effort and I feel great.

Currently feeling: Excited to see my friends and family for the weekend. I love that we’re only 5.5 hours away from home and I can’t wait to make new memories this weekend.

Happy Thursday friends… treat yourself to a coffee and get ready for the weekend! xo

The post Currently. appeared first on The Samantha Show- A Cleveland Life + Style Blog.

I’ve always been spastic and somewhat of a hot mess. My husband is a super neat, organized person and me? Well, I’m not. I’m not a pig, I just have SO much shit that I never have a place for all of it. I know, I know..”everything has a place”. But not my stuff. There’s just too much of it.

The past week has been insanity. First, I realized that I was missing the memory card with all of the home movies I’ve ever taken of my kids. I remember the card being full at Christmas and taking it out at my parents house. I remember thinking ” I need to put this in a safe place and make sure I transfer these movies somewhere”.

Well too little too late. Because when I went to charge the video camera for our trip to CLE, the memory card wasn’t in there. It was the card that I had replaced the other card with while at my parents house. SO where is the card? No idea. I ripped the entire house apart looking for that thing. I checked drawers, boxes, baskets… nothing. It has to be somewhere… unless it got thrown away in the Christmas wrapping paper madness but I mean, will I ever know? Maybe it will show up down the road. But that’s 5 years of memories I can’t find and I’m sick to my stomach over it.

I was thinking maybe it was in one of my purses. A specific purse I thought I may have had in Ohio. So when I went to grab it to look, I couldn’t find it. WTF is going on here?! I mean, now that’s TWO things missing and driving me to the mad house while I look for them.

Well third time’s a charm right? I went to grab my license today and couldn’t find THAT either. I had it Monday night when I picked up packages from UPS and now, no where to be found. I called UPS, I checked my car, I checked purses, wallets, ugh everything. And nothing.

This happens all the time. I can’t find things when I need to find them and it stresses me out and ruins my mood. It eats me alive, especially if it’s something important. And two of these things are clearly very important.

But I know why this happens.

I’m always in a rush.

I don’t take time to put things in their place.

I’m always late.

I’m always running out of the door. Probably yelling at my kids to get a move on.

So maybe I need to take this as a sign from the universe. Maybe it’s telling me I need to slow down. Maybe I need to declutter a bit and find a place for everything. Maybe I need to focus on one thing at a time instead of trying to do 800 things at once. I’m only ONE person and to be honest, it can be a lot to handle. But clearly I’m trying to do too much and I’m going to take this as a sign to make some changes.

Because sometimes, we just need to listen to the universe, right?

The post When the universe is trying to teach you a lesson appeared first on The Samantha Show- A Cleveland Life + Style Blog.

End of the month means another iPhone photo dump and recap! I feel like I didn’t take that many pictures this month and I’m thinking it’s because of the rain. It seriously rained so much here but that’s okay because April showers bring May flowers, right?!

So to kickoff the month, we celebrated my first baby turning 6. Not this baby right here, she just wanted to hold the balloon. But Charlie girl, our black lab turned 6 on April 2nd! She celebrated with dog-friendly cookies and a nice, long walk!

N had an Easter parade at school and P decided she needed to dress for the occasion as well.

I headed to an event at Elloqui to benefit one of the local animal shelters. Dani always puts on the greatest events and it was so nice to have a little girl time with other DC bloggers! Rhinestones, braid bar, cookies, champs, and of course, shopping! I purchased a choker and clutch because I mean, 10% of sales were being donated to the animal shelter and I’m not going to not help them out!

We went exploring and found a state park near our house with a beach, playground, trails, putt-putt, and more! Please take note of N’s pirate face below… phenomenal.

The kids had their first dentist visit since we moved and I totally wish I could go here. They gave them so many goodies and I loved everyone there.

When it wasn’t raining, we spent a lot of time outside at the park, riding bikes, and blowing bubbles. Look at this little girl and her hair. Jealous.

We headed back to Cleveland for Easter and had so much fun with friends and family. We may be moving back there in the near future so it was nice to remember why that will always be “home” and how important it is to be around family. More to come on that later…

I attended a event with Hush Puppies at Masseria in D.C. and it was seriously SO much fun! I had the chance to learn more about the brand, chat with other fab D.C. ladies and eat delicious food. It’s been a few weeks since I’ve decided to give up meat (still eating chicken here and there until I transition fully over) and loved that they had vegetarian options!

I keep telling these kids to stop growing up and they wont’ listen to me. She had her ears pierced when she was a baby and then decided last year that she didn’t want to wear earrings anymore. So after weeks of begging me to get them re-pierced, I took her last week! Seriously, she didn’t even flinch let alone shed a tear. #badass. And can we talk about my handsome little tee ball player? I can’t even stand it! I can’t wait for his first game this weekend!

Lady and I did a photoshoot in Old Town last Sunday and then met my friends for brunch in Clarendon. There are so many cute little areas around here so if and when we move, I will definitely miss those. However, I will NOT miss the insane traffic to get anywhere. People weren’t joking when they warned me about that!

Oh and p.s…that Unicorn Frappucino was not good. I also didn’t want to drink it because of the nutritional facts since I’ve been counting my Macros (more on that later too) and working out like a madwoman. Bathing suit season is only a few weeks away and mama needs to be serious! But at least it looks pretty, right?

Stay tuned because May is going to be even crazier! Trips to Georgia, North Carolina, and Ohio… can’t wait!! Have a great weekend babes! xo

The post April iPhone photo dump appeared first on The Samantha Show- A Cleveland Life + Style Blog.

Guess who’s headed away for the weekend… THIS GIRL.

Guess who doesn’t have her kids with her… THIS GIRL.

Guys, you know I love my kids. But it’s been a lot to handle lately. I don’t know what the heck is going on with them, especially my oldest. We’ve been having some behavioral issues recently and I’m not exactly sure why. The behavioral specialist I saw recommended 1,2,3 Magic and I plan to get some reading done on the plane today. Because when else will I find the time to do it?

Anyways, some more random Thursday thoughts for you…

I didn’t get to work out yesterday and I didn’t get to eat my normal breakfast and I SWEAR that set the tone for my day. I didn’t record any of my meals, I snacked (a lot), and I kind of binged a little at the end of the night. Totally not me recently and I hated how it felt. I’m going to do my best to stay on track this weekend but also going to allow myself to indulge a little. Gotta live ya life!

I cannot wait to visit my favorite little town in Georgia this weekend. With plenty of line dancing going down. EEK

It drives me insane when I see people jump 30k in ONE WEEKEND on Instagram. So fake it makes me sick. Like, if you’re just trying to make your numbers climb so you can like, omg make it, #byefelicia. Instagram is about building a community, inspiring others, being genuine, and CONNECTION. I’ll get off my soapbox now…

D.C. traffic might be one of the most frustrating things in America. Like, I literally can’t go anywhere without getting stuck in it.

I’m so excited to try the new Kylie lip kits. I’m addicted. I know everyone has their opinions about the family but hands down, some of my favorite lipsticks.

I’ve come to terms with the fact that I’m never going to feel fully rested. P kicks me all night, the dogs or cats wake me up, I can’t fall back to sleep if I wake up randomly, yeah… I just suck at sleeping. If you have tips, holla at ya girl.

Does anyone have a love-hate relationship with the zoo? I love to go and see the animals and clearly my kids do too. But it also makes me sad and I just want them to have more space. I felt a lot better when I found out most are born in captivity but still, I just want them to be happy and free. Maybe not released into the wild or anything but MORE space would be sufficient!

The CAVS are doing werk in the playoffs and it just makes me extra proud to be a Clevelander.

I’m bursting at the seams with all of the chaos and exciting things happening around here but I can’t tell you just yet. It’s coming… soon… stay tuned.

And with that, homegirl out. Make sure you’re following along on Insta so I can show you what’s going down during adult weekend! xo

The post Thursday thoughts. appeared first on The Samantha Show- A Cleveland Life + Style Blog.

It’s been 6 years since I started this blog. 6 years of marriage. 6 years of military life.

Over the past 6 years we’ve lived in 3 different states, experienced 2 deployments, and welcomed 2 children into the world.

We’ve had wonderful experiences, made life-long friendships, and been places we’d never thought possible.

There have been ups and downs, we’ve taken the bad with the good, and we’ve both made sacrifices in our own ways.

I had a really hard time adjusting to the military life when this journey first began. I was young, pregnant, emotional, and lacked life experience. I was angry, I was frustrated, and I felt more alone than I ever had in my life. I lashed out a lot at the fact my husband was always gone, mostly because I missed him but also because I didn’t understand that’s what I was marrying into. I didn’t know anything about the military or what the lifestyle entailed beforehand so it was a really hard transition for me.

Everything was happening so quickly and I had just been diagnosed with anxiety. Which down the road would later be diagnosed as anxiety, depression, and panic disorder. I’ve since gotten all of it under control (for the most part) but as you can imagine, it wasn’t an easy time in my life.

But I’ve learned a lot in the past 6 years. I’ve grown to be a more supportive and appreciative wife. I’ve learned to be a mother and accept the fact that I’m not perfect. I’ve learned to be independent, take care of a household, and be flexible. I’ve been forced to adapt to my surroundings, ask for help when I need it, and make do with what I have. I can honestly say the person I was 6 years ago is not the person I am today. But for the better.

And now, it’s time for a new chapter. Over the next few months, my husband will be transitioning out of the military.

To be honest, we weren’t expecting this. We thought we had at least 6 more years left. And then from there, we assumed we’d continue to 20 and he’d retire. But God had a different plan for us and that’s what we’re rolling with. He’s done his duty as a soldier and it’s time to jump back into the civilian world.

It’s scary, no doubt. This is all we’ve known as a married couple. So where are we going now?

CLEVELAND, OHIO.

We’ve decided that a move back to Cleveland, Ohio is in everyone’s best interest. We both grew up in the area and my family is still there. It’s where we want to settle down and raise our kids. So far, the stars have aligned and we’ve found a house we love. We aren’t sure when Z’s official last date will be but we ask that you please keep us in your prayers as he looks for employment and we transition.

We’re hoping this is our last move for awhile, if not ever. Our kids have adapted when they’ve needed to and we’ve started from scratch, three times over now. It’s time for a fresh start in a familiar place. And we couldn’t be more excited for this new adventure to begin.

Thank you to everyone who has supported us, cheered us on, and followed our journey over the past 6 years. Stay tuned because the adventure isn’t over, it’s just a new chapter XO

The post A new chapter. appeared first on The Samantha Show- A Cleveland Life + Style Blog.

Ugh, someone give me an IV of coffee, would ya?! This weekend was super busy but thankfully, it was well spent with my people. Since we’re moving (did you catch that? Read up on it here) my landlord has listed our house for sale. Which means lots of showings=leaving the house a lot. So I can confidently say we spent a lot of time outside of the house this weekend!

Saturday morning we grabbed coffee while we had a showing, dropped the dog back off at home and headed to Lady’s ballet class. Followed by an immediate hop to the other side of town for Bubby’s tee ball game. After his game we ran home to change and then left again for you guessed it, another showing. We grabbed lunch at Zoe’s Kitchen and stopped at the old prison turned apartment complex near our house and it was SO coo. I’m not sure I could live there because it just kind of creeped me out but the idea behind it is pretty creative!

Sunday morning we had two more showings so we took a walk to the playground, grabbed some donuts, and prepped for a BBQ at a friend’s house. I swear, I always make friends and then it’s time to move. One thing I won’t miss about military life is making friends just to leave them. But I do love the fact that I know people all over the country.

This is a super exciting week for a few reasons but first, because my intern starts this morning! Well one of them at least The other one will be working remotely so I will be training her via Skype but I’m excited to have one here with me. Stay tuned for an intro!

Hope y’all have a kickass Monday… see you tomorrow!  XO

The post Monday musings. appeared first on The Samantha Show- A Cleveland Life + Style Blog.

People have told me I’m a hypochondriac all my life. I think a lot of it has to do with my anxiety; the minute I feel a little funny, I’m worried it’s some life-threatening condition, aka I’m dying. I know I’m not the only only one who becomes Dr. Google at the drop of a dime. Admit it, you’ve done it!

I had been feeling a little off for a week or two and decided to make an appointment with my doctor. I called and they instructed me to go to the ER if I wasn’t feeling well but didn’t think it was that big of a deal. I was just not feeling “right” and wanted to talk to someone about it. I chalked it up to the fact that I was no longer taking a medication that I took daily for 6 years. Even though I tapered off the medicine instead of stopping cold-turkey, I knew it would be normal to have some withdrawal symptoms.

Last Monday while driving my son to school, I felt numbness in my arm and chest.

This freaked me out. I didn’t feel right and I was afraid to continue onto the highway and have something happen while driving. My husband had appointments he couldn’t miss so the best thing he could do was meet me and take N to school while I took P with me to the ER. Not ideal but I didn’t have much of a choice.

I went to the ER, told them my symptoms, had an EKG, Chest X-rays, and blood work and everything came back normal. They said that maybe it was stress related or maybe I had pulled something while at the gym. They gave me a steroid and some Motrin and sent me on my way.

I had started developing a little rash under my arm the day before but didn’t think it was related while at the ER. I had been Googling and asking around and thought maybe it was razor burn or it had just gotten irritated from something I wore.

Since I still had my scheduled appointment the next day, I figured I would just ask my doctor about it instead of cancelling my appointment. And I did. After over an hour wait (ridiculous) and a quick ten minutes while she Googled images (I saw her do it), she said it was some sort of rash (duh) and gave me a cream. I asked about the chest pains, numbness and other symptoms I had been having and if she thought that it was just stress related/I pulled something. Her response? “If that’s what the ER told you.” Ugh, not comforting. But who was I to argue?

(What the rash has looked like over the past week)

That cream BURNED. (And later I would find out it wasn’t going to help a viral infection so it did more harm than good). The next day, I still felt terrible and not like myself. So despite having been to the doctor and ER twice that week, I decided to head back to the ER for a third opinion.

I’ll admit, I was a bit feisty walking in there. I was so frustrated and just didn’t feel good. Like, at all. So after another EKG and a good 2 hour wait in my room, I finally saw a nurse. I told her I had been through all of this twice that week and just wanted to figure out what the rash was and get a move on.

Once the doctor came in it only took her a few minutes, a few questions, and a quick look at my rash to determine I had shingles. SHINGLES. Finally… a diagnosis! She asked if I had been stressed lately (yes) and if I had Chicken Pox (twice..yes). She prescribed me some meds and finally, I had some relief knowing I wasn’t crazy.

In case you’re not familiar with Shingles, it’s pretty much Chickenpox for adults. It happens when you’ve had Chickenpox previously and the virus gets reactivated after being dormant. Pretty much, it hides out in your nerve cells until it has a reason to become active again. Stress will do it! It hurts because the virus is damaging the nerves and causing pain. The rash becomes blisters, the blisters become fluid-filled, and then they open and crust over. The whole blister process can take anywhere from 10-14 days and you can be in pain two weeks before and up to two weeks after, as long as you don’t have any additional complications.

The past few days haven’t been fun. I’ve been taking medicine so I feel a lot better and relief is in sight. But if I wouldn’t have gone back into the ER, it could be way worse by now. Luckily, I caught it pretty early and it stayed pretty under control. I mean, all of the symptoms were right here! And they literally happened just like this article describes them.

I felt off.

I had a terrible migraine.

I slept for 12 hours and was STILL tired.

A few days later, I was super itchy under my arm. (No rash had appeared yet.) Like seriously, worst itch I’ve ever felt in my life.

I felt chest pains; not like a pressure but just an achy, constant, sometimes burning chest pain. It hurt to lay on my side and sleeping become unbearable.

The pain became worse when I laid down or on my side.

I had numbness in my arm, chest, and armpit.

Flu-like symptoms without a fever.

Shingles is often hard to diagnose because of the stages and how late the rash appears. But as a lesson in general, if you feel like something isn’t right, it’s probably not. Anxiety can cause you to feel things that may only be in your head, yes. But sometimes, it actually is something and you need to trust yourself and stay persistent. And in this case, I’m glad I listened to my gut that something more than just anxiety was going on.

Have you ever had Shingles or known anyone that had Shingles? 

The post That time I got Shingles from stress appeared first on The Samantha Show- A Cleveland Life + Style Blog.

The past few weeks have been insane. Like, insane.They’ve been filled with car rides, family time, and visiting with loved ones. Can’t complain but I will say, I’m a little over being in the car. Over 16 hours last weekend and 12 hours this weekend… mama needs a break.

But we spent last weekend (Fri-Mon) in Lake Norman, NC and this past weekend (Wed-Sun) in Cleveland, Ohio. Which is our soon-to-be-home (again) and we can’t wait! It still feels surreal and I’m hoping the next few weeks go smoothly and everything just falls into place.

Lake Norman for Memorial Day weekend has become a tradition with 30+ friends and family. Our very gracious and generous hosts open their home to all of us and we have the best time in the sun and water. The kids literally go non-stop all day and have become great friends with the neighbors kids. So they love it just as much as we do!

This past weekend we headed home to CLE for my cousin’s wedding. The weather was absolutely BEAUTIFUL. Sunny and 75…does it get any better? And can we talk about this view below? That’s my parents backyard. Ugh, so jelly. At least I can go spend the night at their house when I want to feel like I’m on vacay, right?

We spent a lot of time at the beach. Nothing like a little sun and sand therapy when you’re feeling down. This Shingles has really taken a toll on my body and it felt good to just sit and relax for awhile. Well until my kids started throwing sand at each other and then, it was time to go.

Friday night we had my cousin’s wedding! The entire thing was absolutely beautiful. It was a perfect night in a perfect location and I’m so happy for my cousin and his new bride. She did an amazing job with all of the decor and details and mama had a great time letting loose on the dance floor

Saying I’m exhausted would be an understatement. I’m excited to be back home and hopefully get back into a routine. I haven’t been to the gym or been eating very well (traveling does that… #life) so it’s definitely a restart kind of week. Lots of things need to get done and oh yeah, did I mention we’re MOVING next month. Oy vey… send coffee. Or wine!

Hope you all had a great weekend! What did everyone do?! 

The post Kicking off summer in Lake Norman and Cleveland. appeared first on The Samantha Show- A Cleveland Life + Style Blog.

Read that again.

You only get 18 summers with your kids. 

I read that somewhere on Instagram last week and my heart sank a little. Because after this summer, I’ll only have 12 and 14 left with my littles.

And if you think about it, it’s probably even less than that because once they hit high school, they have jobs and friends and want nothing to do with their family. Heartbreaking right?

Do you remember how magical summertime was when you were a kid?

When you could stay up and sleep in late.

Go to the pool and swim until you were wrinkly.

Chase the ice cream truck down the street.

Go to all the local festivals and parades.

Camp outside in the backyard.

Ride your bike for hours.

Vacations to the beach or lake.

Family reunions.

Hide and Go Seek and Ghost in the Graveyard.

Pretty much have the best time of your life. Because you had no responsibilities and your biggest worry was whether or not it was going to rain that day. And even then, watching TV in your pajamas wasn’t so bad.

Summer is already magical but now that I’m a parent, it’s up to me to give my kids the chance to do these things that make it so special.

Even when I don’t want to go to the pool, I’ll put on the bathing suit and throw diving rings until dark.

I’ll sit outside and let them ride their bikes up and down the street 100 times, even when the house needs cleaned.

I’ll plan baking days and let them pour in the flour, even if it ends up all over the floor.

I’ll pay $5 for an ice cream cone, even though I could buy a whole quart at the store for that much.

I’ll sweat my butt off at stinky and dirty carnivals because my kids think they’re magical.

I’ll do it all. Because I would do anything for my kids and I want them to enjoy their summers as much as I did.

And because nothing lasts forever, and I only have so many summers left with them.

So get out there, Mom. Your kids won’t remember the piles of laundry or the way you looked in a bathing suit. They’ll remember all the wonderful times they had with you and how thankful they are to have a mom that did it all with them.

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